When I first saw you it was on the floor of a friend’s bedroom. You had modelled for university photo -film they had produced. I thought you were absolutely gorgeous. A few alcoholic drinks and some stalking of your (very sparse) Facebook profile later I sent you a friend request. To my surprise you actually accepted. Several hours, and even more alcoholic beverages, later and I decided it would be a really good idea to message telling you that I thought you were beautiful (honestly drunk me is both a genius and an idiot). Luck must have been on my side that night as in your sleep addled state you actually replied to me.
Over the next few days (amazingly) we continued talking and you entranced me with your wit, sarcasm, and love of Lord of the Rings. When we first met up I was convinced that you didn’t like me as you said very little to me. Later I found out it was actually because you had the (very misinformed) impression that I was cool, and you were intimidated by me. It wasn’t long after that when we met up again, this time for a bar crawl organised by a society that we were both a part of. When it came to you, alcohol must’ve really been my friend, because several drinks and a drunken kiss in a nightclub later and I discovered that you actually liked me back.
Days turned into weeks and we continued to get to know each other more. We went on dates, we explored new places, we made ‘us’ an official thing. The first time I told you I loved you I panicked. Not because I didn’t mean it, but because I thought it was too soon, that you’d decide I was too attached and find some polite way to pull away. Luckily for me (after making me sweat a little) you let me know that you were just as attached.
Those five months that we had together in Newcastle were so amazing. We made so many incredible memories together. We even got a baby dragon (who really likes goats). Unfortunately, the good times couldn’t last forever and with a Visa getting close to its expiry date you had to return to America. I was glad you were able to stay for my birthday, even if on the day I failed to realise it was my birthday for a good few hours as we were so busy packing. When the day came what you walk away at the airport was so hard.
We managed to settle (a little bit rockily) into long distance. We knew it was going to be tough, but I don’t think either of us realised just how tough it would be. One night, after about a month separation and copious amounts of wine, I decided that waiting until December to see you again was just far too long. So over the next few weeks I booked flights and a hotel and went to visit you. Being with you, in your country was amazing, the only downside to the trip was that it wasn’t long enough. One thing’s for certain though; if watching you walk away was tough, being one walking away was excruciating.
Being back in Newcastle without you feels unfamiliar. Strange and cold. Like everything is a little less bright without you around. So now I’m counting down the days until I see you again.
With all my love,